As The Hacker gets ready for his son and daughter's 10th birthday party, suspicions start to fall on Amy Jr., daughter of Sonic and Amy. The evidence The Hacker collects to prove his hypothesis gets stronger and stronger, as time goes by.
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Update!I have made a form about my series. I made it in order to get some input into my new story series. I can't wait to get some answers!
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`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More
Sta.sh
Advices:
"Sonic Jr and Amy Jr’s 6th birthday is 4 March 2013. Amy Jr. is always happy when she gets to spend the day with Moe.
She can’t explain it, but, she enjoys his company. Her behaviour towards Moe doesn’t alarm many people."
You use very short sentences. That makes story feel somehow cut into pieces for me. Short sentences are good to create drama, to make story flow faster, but you shouldn´t overuse them. If you read a bestseller, you can easily find sentences which take five lines and more.
Rating:
I can´t tell much about characters, as I´m not familiar with the fandom (I assume it´s based on the Sonic, the hedgehog). That´s why I give average rating for originality.
-> As Sonic finishes, Amy Jr. smiles and responds with, “Well, he’s cute, can whip a joke out of any sentence, and is smart. I tell ya, Dad, Moe has a way to make my day, no matter how bad it gets.” <- Epic foreshadowing.
-> The Hacker thinks how he is going to word it for a few moments. “Well, let’s see. A month ago, at the playground, the public one, a girl decided to talk to Moe. You know? Amelia? She’s a good friend of his. At any rate, Amy Jr. ran up to them. She pushed the girl away from Moe and told Amelia that Moe was busy. As soon as Amelia left, Amy Jr. kept watching the girl as she left. Don’t tell me this has no meaning. I think she may be attached to our son, as I get a feeling her ‘Birthday Present’ doesn’t come in stores!” <- A very strong piece of evidence that there's something obviously fishy going on.
I think Amy Jr. should decide for herself on whether or not she wants Moe. However, I am more than 90% certain she wants more than a mere friendship with Moe. I dunno. Call me a shipper, but, I'll chance it.
To those who disagree with my views about Amy Jr. taking a liking to Moe, tell me why you're opposing the pairing. Sure, they're different animal species. However, that isn't the big picture, in my eyes. I think that as long as they respect one another and make each other happy, they can do as they wish. I have no qualms about them getting together, someday.
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