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January 30, 2013
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A New Life Era by SonAmyFan362 A New Life Era by SonAmyFan362
As The Hacker gets ready for his son and daughter's 10th birthday party, suspicions start to fall on Amy Jr., daughter of Sonic and Amy. The evidence The Hacker collects to prove his hypothesis gets stronger and stronger, as time goes by.

In case you wish to share your input for Critique, you can Copy text directly from the story and Paste into a quick Notepad to share your input on a specific part of the story.

:bulletred:Update!

I have made a form about my series. I made it in order to get some input into my new story series. I can't wait to get some answers! :D!

Link to the form: [link] .
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:iconmarcusthehacker:
I had a hunch something was up when Sonic made Amy Jr. turn around to face him. Sonic warns his daughter that Hacker might get suspicious of her when she's around Moe. Sonic gets a bit of a wake up call when his daughter tells him how she feels about Moe.

-> As Sonic finishes, Amy Jr. smiles and responds with, “Well, he’s cute, can whip a joke out of any sentence, and is smart. I tell ya, Dad, Moe has a way to make my day, no matter how bad it gets.” <- Epic foreshadowing.

-> The Hacker thinks how he is going to word it for a few moments. “Well, let’s see. A month ago, at the playground, the public one, a girl decided to talk to Moe. You know? Amelia? She’s a good friend of his. At any rate, Amy Jr. ran up to them. She pushed the girl away from Moe and told Amelia that Moe was busy. As soon as Amelia left, Amy Jr. kept watching the girl as she left. Don’t tell me this has no meaning. I think she may be attached to our son, as I get a feeling her ‘Birthday Present’ doesn’t come in stores!” <- A very strong piece of evidence that there's something obviously fishy going on.

I think Amy Jr. should decide for herself on whether or not she wants Moe. However, I am more than 90% certain she wants more than a mere friendship with Moe. I dunno. Call me a shipper, but, I'll chance it.

To those who disagree with my views about Amy Jr. taking a liking to Moe, tell me why you're opposing the pairing. Sure, they're different animal species. However, that isn't the big picture, in my eyes. I think that as long as they respect one another and make each other happy, they can do as they wish. I have no qualms about them getting together, someday.
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The Artist thought this was FAIR
1 out of 2 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconlulu-illussions:
Possitives: The story is interesting and idea of it is quite simple to underestand, white it still isn´t too plain. Nice balance.

Advices:
"Sonic Jr and Amy Jr’s 6th birthday is 4 March 2013. Amy Jr. is always happy when she gets to spend the day with Moe.
She can’t explain it, but, she enjoys his company. Her behaviour towards Moe doesn’t alarm many people."

You use very short sentences. That makes story feel somehow cut into pieces for me. Short sentences are good to create drama, to make story flow faster, but you shouldn´t overuse them. If you read a bestseller, you can easily find sentences which take five lines and more.

Rating:
I can´t tell much about characters, as I´m not familiar with the fandom (I assume it´s based on the Sonic, the hedgehog). That´s why I give average rating for originality.
What do you think?
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1 out of 2 deviants thought this was fair.

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:iconmrsharleenquinnzel:
MrsHarleenQuinnzel Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I like this story a lot it's very cute  :iconcutenessplz: I really enjoyed reading it, thank you for creating this adorable story :)
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:iconsonamyfan362:
SonAmyFan362 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2013  Professional Writer

Thanks. :D! There's quite a bit of the series, so, feel free to look around, eh.

 

I am already writing the concluding story to the First Saga. But, not to worry, the A New Life Era series itself will continue. Basically, the Sagas are different chapters in the storyline.

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:iconerarosaimmortal21:
erarosaimmortal21 Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2013
Good story. Interesting how amy jr and moe are completely different speices but have a connection. I really like this, its very cute and they are both in dangerous place being that their parent are enemies. I don't see anything wrong with pair joining up, it makes a change to orginality. Bad sides; the sentances are a bit broken up and short other than that it was enjoyable and I see you're storylines improving.
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:iconsonamyfan362:
SonAmyFan362 Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you. I think Amy Jr and Moe are the Romeo and Juliette of the story.

However, The Hacker himself doesn’t have anything against the potential of Amy Jr falling for Moe - The Hacker is merely engaging in the art of shipping. I’m sure Sonic won’t mind it, either. However, Amy Jr and Moe might make a scene with their parents if either one doesn’t agree with the pairing.
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:iconerarosaimmortal21:
erarosaimmortal21 Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2013
You're welcome. I see good to know.
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:iconsonamyfan362:
SonAmyFan362 Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2013  Professional Writer
Yep. I get a feeling that Amy Jr. will not really want anyone other than Moe.

As for Sonic Jr., I don't really know if he'll get attached to BIOS, and if he does, will BIOS reciprocate?
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:iconerarosaimmortal21:
erarosaimmortal21 Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2013
Yeah, make them stick with eachother.
Only you future stories will tell.
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